“The heart of a father is the masterpiece of nature.”
Prevost Abbe
I believe men these days have made a huge step towards being good fathers.
Many of us had Dads who were far more subject to the patriarchial system than we find nowadays.
This meant that our Dads were often absent. Either away working or somewhat emotionally absent when at home.
As a child, I grew up in a home run by my mother. My father worked and brought in money for our family. He wasn't expected to do much around the house except in the garden.
My father's generation suppressed their gentler, more feminine qualities. The idea of a man having feminine qualities in my childhood was ludicrous. Men were masculine and had to behave like men. And boys had to toughen up or get pushed around. Our emotional range was limited and stunted.
Being self-employed, I took my children on my work adventures, to Africa and around the festivals. I spent a huge amount of time with them compared to my time with my Dad. I feel so happy we had this time together.
I have a great Dad, yet we missed being as close as I am with my children because we didn't have the time together. And that was at a time when men had a lot more time with their families than they do now.
And yet, I see men doing so beautifully being Dads. Attentive, totally committed to being the father, deeply loving, present, emotionally vital for their sons and daughters, working hard, and growing. Good, strong men far more in touch with their feminine qualities than could have been conceived of in my childhood.
Bless you, Dads. You have changed your children's lives by being the gentle, deeply loving Dad all children would hope for. They will never know the hardness, the loneliness, the hidden fear and pain we felt conforming to our harsh, surviving, wounded masculine society.
What a blessing your love is for your children.
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